ouch. so this is life. so bleak, so painful, so melancholic?
no.. dat wasn't my past perspective of life. how did my view on life change so dramatically?
i have no idea. im starting to wonder.. wads my purpose in life. am i even alive inside me?
i feel so dead, so numb and so fake. everything seems so surreal to me.. maybe it would be a blessing in disguise to awake and find myself in a dream..
or probably, i should slash my wrist, to see the blood.. to noe im actually alive.. to noe im actually real..
well, maybe death or killing myself can't help much cos im already dead inside..
wads the difference?
all the tears every night, im so tired of it. and though laugh everyday and claims dat "life is wonderful..", wad does it shows? no one knows the sadness within..
no one knows im dead inside.
everyone thinks im a happy lil ger whos contented with her life..
she has frens, sisters, wadever, lots of them.... wad else matters? but. wad about the love?

LIFE IS FULL OF SHIT!!

fuck my life. lately, its becoming soooo miserable. arghh. so mani troubles. fuck every single human being in this fucked up world. its because of u fuck face humans dat im having all these problems. to hell with u all lah. i hope im the ONLY human left in this world. den im free from all motherfuckin bullshits! u sonofabitches have some mental problems izzit. leave me outta ur life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i wanna be alone in my isolated world. yes. ALONE. get it? A-fuckin-LONE. annoy me again n u assholes are sooo dead. all of u who have pissed me off, may u all have ur throat slit and maggots shall fuck ur wounds. and i'll make sure u drown in ur own nightmares. or u shall get fucked by million of bees and die in a severe MRT crash. u bunch of retards dunno who u are dealing with yet huh.. fuck EVERYONE!!
U ALL OUGHT TO FUCKIN PERISH!!

to Nadira darling especially: we are best frens/sisters forever. i hope u know that, and misunderstandings are bound to occur sometimes. i hope it would not affect us. cos I, joei loves u to bits. i noe u do too. im sorry and yupp, hugs.